That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm like, not good at living.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
