girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
As shirtless as possible
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
