she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize