I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
