You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Randomize
