we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
