I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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