Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize