I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
