Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I touched a dick in church today
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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