you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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