what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name