she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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