I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Small penises have feelings too.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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