p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
