I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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