i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize