So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Randomize
