ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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