Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
i've created a new STD.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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