like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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