i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
