like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
