I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize