Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
