I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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