I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
