Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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