So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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