I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
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I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
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Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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