You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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