i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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