You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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