Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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