she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
