i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Never underestimate the power of titties
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
