just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
