the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
accomplished twins. life is a go
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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