I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
