Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
