Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize