Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
