oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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