Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
What drink are we having for lunch?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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