Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
