Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize