she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize