he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
The power of my boobs compel you
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
