I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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