Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
