ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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