I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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